I had my first Date with Stephen Ryan on Saturday,

It was soo nice. He first called me up at 3pm and told me he was gonna take a nap and call me later, but we would get together around 7pm. I love that, It gives me plenty of time to plan. Even though I had already straightened my hair that morning, I knew it would still take me 4 hours to perfect my toenails and makeup, and try on the perfect outfit 10 times.

He called me my at 6: 30 and got directions- I was so nervous I called up Allie before hand to get a little pep talk, and to tell her what I decided to wear. ( I wore a pink shirt with � length sleeve, and a turquoise tank top underneath and I wore dark denim jeans) Looks casual, yet put together. Besides, I could throw on my dressy denim blazer over it, in case he showed up looking dressy, or I could wear my sweatshirt in case he looked casual. Then he gets to my house about 7:30.

He�s so cute! I give him the grand tour of the Apt, and I ask him If he�s hungry or whatever and toss on my boots. He wore a black button up shirt with dark jeans and a studded belt. cute!

We go to Outback, Which I suggested because I knew he ate there before and assumed he would like it. We got there and of course it was really busy, so we leave and peruse the Sports-mart across from it, and play with all the equipment and stuff. We get a seat at the bar finally and order a beer and right when it comes and we take our first sip, we finally get a table. We had a good laugh about it.

We had really good conversation, over dinner and it seemed to be going well. I made a joke that I had to have a really good time because my friend Allie was sitting at home for the weekend and I had to make out with him, just so I could tell her all about it. (That was my little way of making a joke, but letting him know I was open to the making-out stuff) he laughed, and agreed..

We got back to my house and It was probably about 10- 30 or 11. We sat on the couch and watched Saturday night live, and We were sitting close but the sexual tension was definetly there. Whenever he would tell a story I would make a point to look into his eyes, but really I was thinking how his mouth would taste. HEHE

We played that little game, where you sit next to someone on the couch and try not to touch each other but really want to. I would constantly shift my position, so if he decided to make a move, he would�nt have to move so far to do it�Waiting for a first kiss is almost as pleasurable as receiving it. It's the expectation. Its that slow motion moment when they are moving in for a kiss, when all the world slows down-when the other person is looking back at you. You lick your lips to make them moist, just in case your partner might put his lips on yours. Subconsciously this is an invitation to your partner that you are more than ready for a kiss.

We played around and flirted a little, he took my hair thing and flung it at me like a rubber band, and we flung it back and forth for a while. He was crossing his legs and I made a comment that I could move over ( away from him if he needed more room) He stretched his legs out next to me, so we are virtually spooning on the couch, yet not touching. His head was turned toward me, but there was no way I was going to come in for the first kiss, I didn�t want to spoil the tension.I wanted to make him do it to me...To show me that he wanted his lips on me. He was yawning a lot and closed his eyes.. I did reach over and start to scratch his back, just in case he needed a physical sign from me, and he started to moan a little. He flung the rubber tie at me one more time, and when I looked down in between us to get it, that�s when it happened. He planted the briefest little kiss- (a peck really) on my lips, when I didn�t see him coming in for it. It was almost like he got a burst of courage and just went for it. He pulled away from me, for only 3 seconds; He was looking at me shyly and started to lean forward and....we were still chest to chest on the couch, and came back for the rest of the kiss, All I could think of was mmm- finally. It was slow and nice. I hope he enjoyed it too. Waited long enough to plant one though- probably nervous just like me. Right after he broke from his kiss with me he whispered to me that he needed to get going home, and I breathed back,, �noo- I don�t want you to� and kissed him for a few more precious seconds.

We talked for a moment about how he was going to tell everyone at work he had seen my underwear and kissed me, then he said seriously, no really I�m not going to tell anyone. I told him that I would tell everyone at work I had seen his underwear too.

He did get his shoes back on, and we hugged at the door. I kissed him goodbye and thanked him for the dinner. I love first kisses.

End of date.

I really like him because he�s sweet and sincere, and I feel as though I can trust him 100%. I�m sure if people found out about us at the command, later on down the line�he would say �sure she�s my girl- she�s cool.� and treat me with respect. But for now� today� It�s secret. Relationships are not against military policy at all, but unless you are ready and willing to try to justify your relationship,to everyone that wants to put their nose in it- and justify your feelings, then it remains secret. This military dating has always left me feeling ugly, like my man was ashamed to have everyone know he would be out in public with such an ugly being.

I saw him briefly across a crowded hallway today, I just think it is so cute, when he is staring at me... and cant come up to me to talk... If he had- about 30 people would see us talking and then by lunch everyone would know.

Ill keep you updated diary fans, if he calls me... ciao!

Well then. ....I'm happy.

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