Not too much going on here. I�m at work and its pretty much just a laid back lunch over here. All the jerky bosses aren�t here either� so its not too bad.

my friend Eddy wrote me an email. Mostly it was about his ex, and living situations back home, and how she probably wouldn�t have been faithful to him anyway if they had stayed together- blah blah. He told me that he thinks you mostly stay on the boat, HA! Anyway he tells me that I don�t have to worry about Sam. (being faithful) and that kind of stuff. He�s such a good spy for me hehe! I will tell him to keep up the good work.

Sam told me a story about japanese television.The story was: Everyone on tv has the biggest shit-eating grin for some reason. Its also the worst acting ever. I don't know what they're saying but they're expressions and body language wasn't taught in drama class. This guy on TV just pulled his pants down and stood on his head, showing everyone his asshole. Everyone else on the show just started laughing. Now if thats not entertainment I don't know what is! That is so gross. For such a technologically advanced country- they sure have some low class humor.

I�m trying to motivate myself to go on a run again today. I guess I will. Then I can go home and crash out if I want to� knowing that I�ve already worked out and stuff- I can be as lazy as I want for the rest of the day. (and watch American idol)

I�m still really sad about not getting to do anything this last weekend. I guess it just hit me that I�m so alone. It only really occurred to me this week. I guess I�ve been spending way too much time alone at home. I really don�t talk to anyone at work, and most of the time I don�t talk to anyone on the phone at home either. Now that I keep getting my plans ruined a lot it�s starting to wear on me. It makes me not want to even make plans with anyone anymore. I know a lot of the reasons why the plans have been falling through is because Rachael has kid now, and so do I, but its sad that we cant get together any more.

Rachael works with all these girls at her office, about 30 total. 7 of those girls she�s really close to- the ones that she hangs with. She can talk to them all day long, and go to lunch with them on break. My sister has the same thing at her office. (Plenty of girls to talk to) I just don�t have that same thing. So basically I�m getting used to being alone all the time. By the time you get back I wont know how to have conversations with people anymore, and wont want to do anything other than be alone reading a book.

You know what this happened to me before when I�m left all alone with no friends to talk to- and when my boyfriend got back I wasn�t used to having anyone around and I turned into an antisocial little shit. And I wanted to instigate little fights all the time because I wasn�t used to conversating with an actual person anymore. Hopefully that won�t happen to us, Sam and i.

Like last night Rach called me, and I missed her phone call when I was running at the track (by myself) when I called her back, she didn�t answer- so our catching up with each other is by telling each other what�s going on in a voicemail. How pathetic. Were not even having our telephone conversations with a real person!!

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