Still out to sea, for another couple of days�Sunday was a holiday routine, so we didn�t have to do anything, but that doesn�t mean I want to work out. Apparently there was a gang of people down there..And you know what�s really funny? There are people here who I have known for 3 or four years and they work out a lot, and in my opinion, they don�t look any different than they did 3 years ago. Not worth it in my book.

Sola left yesterday too. That sux. I could already tell the difference that she�s gone.. I am the only girl venturing through the male berthing areas now. Now I don�t have anyone to tell my secrets to at work except for you -diary� And we are never going to get any new people here either,, so that means when people leave there is more work to go around, and since our ship is turning into a civilian ship, everyone will be leaving and there�s more work to do. Blah�

So I didn�t have anyone to talk to yesterday-except for this one guy named Chris P�. And he�s 35 and lives at home with his parents, and is alone�so I don�t know why I was listening to him drone on about what I am doing wrong in my life� basically what I got from the whole conversation was that I should just resign to give up on all relationships.. Its just not in the cards for people like me� and that I shouldn�t really trust any friends either�so give that up too. My focus should be on being happy just being alone.. All the time ..And getting used to it. Psshheesh whatever� it took me about 30 minutes to come to my senses and realize where the source was coming from�a loser�and then he kept mouthing the words �give me a blowjob� and I said stop it Chris.. Like 3 times and I said you know what.. You are really beginning to piss me off. I hate being the only female among all these dirty ugly males. Nasty. But I assume they are like this at every job. Sick!

Ever since that attack I had last Christmas I am so untrustworthy of men in general and I think of all of them as slimy horny beasts. I just don�t think highly of many men at all. And I still have problems sleeping�

So I went to have dinner and I ate with my friend David. We had a good conversation, apparently some dipshit at my work (who is the same religion as me) had told him he was going to hell for drinking alcohol. So then David thought that all the people from our religion were narrow minded and as stupid as that asshole. I told him that nobody but God has the right to judge� Glad I could clear that up.

So I go to the berthing at night and a lot of us girls sat around in our underwear and pajamas and talked shit about people who weren�t there�about our fat asses, and plastic surgery�and ASS Cream, and laughed a lot. We tried to whisper but we cant! It was almost like a slumber party.

It was funny that my friend Petra told me the other day that I was one of the funniest people she knows�thanks! I try. It is worse when I feel that I have an audience to entertain.. I cant stop.so I was telling stories and doing my impressions of Chief Hartzell telling me how I shouldn�t wear a thong because it will give me a UTI. Humph whatever�

Well until later. Only 1 and a half more days till I�m home. geeshh

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